Stress and Post Turmatic Stress Disorder
by baileybeagle
Summary: What if Olivia couldn't handle almost being raped? What if the stress of the job and the Post Turmatic Stress disorder got to her?
1. Nightmares

**LAW & ORDER: SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT...**

**STRESS & POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER...**

**Disclaimer: **

**Law & Order SVU and characters do not belong to me. **

**Summary: **

**What if Olivia couldn't handle being almost raped? What if the stress and the PTSD got to her?**

**M RATED...**

**CHAPTER 1: NIGHTMARES...**

**OLIVIA'S P.O.V.**

I sit up in bed, still unable to get a full night's sleep since I was almost raped almost two years ago. I look at the bottle of pills on my nightstand.

Trazodone prescribed to help me sleep.

Still the nightmares come and I wake up. I pick up the pill bottle and go to get a drink of water.

The last thought I have is I can't handle this anymore. I take more pills then I'm supposed and find my way to my couch.

Where I fall onto it…

From what seems far away there is a knock at the door, but I can't get up to answer it.

'What have I done?'

"Liv…It's Elliot!" I hear.

**ELLIOT'S P.O.V.**

"Liv…open up!" I say after not receiving an answer, though I know she is home.

Finally I let myself in and find Olivia on the couch. Barley breathing and a very week pulse.

I call for an ambulance.

"Come on, Liv, stay with me. Come on, Olivia." I say trying to keep her awake.

The ambulance arrives and Olivia is taken to the hospital.

Where they pump her stomach and after a while I go to talk to her,

"Liv what happened?" I ask. "I just wanted it to stop." Olivia whispers and I am shocked to see tears in her eyes. "Wanted what to stop?" I ask gently as Fin, Munch and the Captain walk in.

"The nightmares…" Olivia says and turns away from everyone and closes her eyes.

Fin, Munch, the Captain and I walk out into the hallway.

"What the hell was she talking about?" I asked and I see that Fin knows something.

"That's for Liv to tell you." Fin says and the three of us just look at him.


	2. The Hospital

**LAW & ORDER: SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT...**

**STRESS & POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER...**

**Disclaimer: **

**Law & Order SVU and characters do not belong to me. **

**Summary: **

**What if Olivia couldn't handle being almost raped? What if the stress and the PTSD got to her?**

**M RATED...**

**CHAPTER 2: THE HOSPITAL...**

**OLIVIA'S P.O.V.**

I heard them in the hallway, though I pretended to be asleep.

"That's for Liv to tell you." I heard Fin say, just as I finally drift off to sleep.

**ELLIOT'S P.O.V.**

"What do you mean...?

'That's for Liv to tell me'?" I asked.

"Just that I think Liv should be the one to tell." Fin replied. "Something happened at the prison, didn't it?" I asked, pressing for answers.

"I can't tell you." Fin replied and I was beginning to lose my temper. "Elliot!" I heard and turned to look at Olivia. "I'll tell you." She whispered.

I walked over and stood by her side, waiting for her to begin.

"I was...almost...raped." Olivia confessed and I stood there in shock.

I looked to the Captain and Munch.

The looks on their faces told me they hadn't known either, but Fin knew because he had been there to save her.

"What?" I asked, unsure if I had heard right. "I was almost raped." Olivia repeated refusing to look any of us in the eye.

"When?" I asked. "You already guessed...at the prison." Olivia replied. "Is that why you tried to kill yourself tonight?" I asked. "I wasn't trying to kill myself...I just wanted the nightmares to end." Olivia replied.

"Excuse me, but visiting hours are over. We need to take her upstairs now." A nurse said. "Upstairs?" Olivia asked. "To the psychiatric ward." The nurse replied.

"But..." Olivia began. "It's procedure." The nurse said and helped Olivia up to take her away.

"We'll come back tomorrow." The captain assured her as she was led away.


	3. The Psychartric Ward

**LAW & ORDER: SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT...**

**STRESS & POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER...**

**Disclaimer: **

**Law & Order SVU and characters do not belong to me. **

**Summary: **

**What if Olivia couldn't handle being almost raped? What if the stress and the PTSD got to her?**

**M RATED...**

**CHAPTER 3: THE PSYCHARTIC WARD...**

**OLIVIA'S P.O.V.**

I look back as I'm led away, everyone waves and I wave back.

Once upstairs I am admitted and finally what seems like hours later I fall asleep.

No dreams or nightmares this time.

The next morning I walk into the dining room area for breakfast and am surprised to see…

Dr. Wong

"What are you doing here?" I ask. "I'm here to talk to you." Dr. Wong tells me.

"About what? A case?" I ask hopefully, but I knew the real reason he was here.

"No, you've been given a leave of absence. I'm here to talk about what you did last night." Dr. Wong tells me.

"Last night I made a mistake. I'm ready to go home." I said getting up. "Olivia, you can't leave here yet. What happened last night? Elliot said you tried to kill yourself." Said Dr. Wong as he to stood up.

"I just wanted the nightmares to end." I said. "What nightmares? What happened to you?" Dr. Wong asked.

"How did you know I was here?" I countered. "Captain Cragen told me. He's worried about you...so is everyone else." He tells me.

After an hour of talking to Dr. Wong he left.

That day I walked the ward and wrote in a notebook.

**THAT EVENING**

It had been a long day, but now visiting hours have finally arrived.

Only two visitors at a time were first two to see me were Captain Cragen and Elliot.

"How are you feeling?" The Captain asked.

"Better, I want out of here though. You sent Dr. Wong to see me, didn't you?" I asked him

"Yes we're all worried about you." The Captain said repeating what Dr. Wong had said earlier.

"Simon is outside waiting to see you. So are Fin an..." Elliot began. "Simon's here?" I asked.

"He heard about what you did. He wants to see you, so do Munch and Fin. I guess we better go so they can visit." Captain Cragen said.

"Who told Simon I was here?" I asked. "I did." Elliot told me. "Why did you tell Simon I was here?" I asked.

"Because he's you family and he deserved to know." Elliot said.

Soon Elliot and Captain Cragen left letting Simon in.

"What happened? Why did you try to kill yourself?" Were the first words out of his mouth.

"Everything was just getting to me. I just go so overwhelmed with work and something that happened to me." I said.

"What was so bad that you thought you had to end your life?" Simon asked. "Almost two years ago, I came close to getting raped." I said not looking him in the eye.

"What? How?" Simon asked. "I went undercover to a women's prison where women were being raped and was almost raped myself." I explained. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" Simon asked. "Because I wanted to forget it ever happened. Now I know how victims feel." I said.

"I'm sorry you went through that. You know you can call me anytime day or night. Please promise me you won't try to kill yourself again." Simon pleaded. "I promise." I said.

Simon left as Munch and Fin came in.

"Hey, Liv..." Fin began.

"Please don't ask me how I'm doing. Everyone has been asking me that question today. I'm doing a lot better than I was last night. I was just so overwhelmed. I already promised Simon I won't try to kill myself again." I told Munch and Fin.

"When are you coming back to work?" Munch asked. "I don't know. I get out of here tomorrow, than I'm going to take some time off." I said. "We miss you at work." Fin told me.

"I know, but I need to deal with what happened to me." I said.

"All right, Liv, stay in touch and you can call any of us anytime." Fin told me.

It wasn't long after that everyone left.

That night I was given different medicine to help me sleep, but the nightmare came back and I was unable to sleep for very long.


End file.
